Case #56 - re The People vs Rocky Costa (lie down Sparky, roll over…good boy)
When Rocky Costa was a Sgt on the Early Mornings shift, he was pretty big. He was no Fat Sam mind you. He couldn’t even give Fat Sam a run for his vending machine money, but he was still pretty big.
One graveyard shift, some deputies jammed a duster (a guy high on P.C.P.) on Gardena Bl. and Figueroa St., right in the middle of the intersection. It was about midnight, and it was cold, but the guy was barefoot and shirtless and sweating his ass off. The deputies requested the Field Sgt respond. Sgt Costa responded along with me and my partner, Jeff Adams in 162B and about four other deputies. So there we were, eight deputies in a semicircle around the duster, with Sgt Costa at the apex of the semicircle. One deputy was giving commands to the duster, which the duster was ignoring. The other deputies were getting ready to swarm the duster and take him to the ground, when Sgt Costa told us to hold off. He walked to his car, dug around in the trunk and returned to his spot in the semicircle, carrying a taser. We had just received the taser at the station a few days before. Sgt Costa examined the taser and said,
“I want to try this thing out.”
The Deputies impatience at having to stand down, was immediately replaced by curiosity. None of us had ever seen the taser in action either. After ten or twenty seconds of fumbling with the taser, Sgt Costa was finally ready for Freddy. He aimed the taser at the duster and asked,
“Are you going to cooperate and do what the deputies tell you?”
“AHHHHHH! Blobbitty, blah, blah bleblangitty blee bong!", or words to that effect, was the duster’s defiant response.
Sgt Costa fired the taser, sending two little metal darts, attached to the taser by thin copper wires, flying at the duster. One dart hit the duster in the chest, the other hit the duster in the lower abdomen. The duster looked at the darts protruding from his torso in surprise, then started to laugh. The duster’s laughter was cut short, when Sgt Costa activated the taser, sending however many bunches of volts of electricity into the duster’s chest and stomach. We were not disappointed with the effect.
“YEEEEEEOOOOOWWWWWW!!!!!”, the duster yelled, as he leapt in the air. In mid-air, he did a 180 degree turn and started churning his arms and legs like he was sprinting. He looked kind of like a Warner Bros. cartoon character. When he landed he took off running northbound away from us. For a moment we were all taken by surprise, by the duster’s reaction, then we all started laughing. The slack in the wire quickly started running out, which would have caused either the darts to be pulled out of the duster, or the wires to be pulled out of the taser, either way, it would have rendered the taser useless, unless Sgt Costa fired another pair of darts into the guy. And Sgt Costa didn’t have another pair of darts. So Sgt Costa ran after the duster, with his right arm extended, to keep the taser as close to the suspect as possible, so the wires wouldn't be pulled loose. Then the 1st pair of deputies, closest to Sgt Costa, realized what was happening and ran after Sgt Costa. Then the next pair of deputies realized what was happening and ran after the first pair of deputies. Then the third pair ran after the second pair and finally the fourth pair of deputies ran after the third pair of deputies. We looked like a formation of geese chasing the duster. All of us were younger and faster (and considerably slimmer) than Sgt Costa and should have been able to catch up and pass him by, but we were laughing so hard we couldn’t run fast. I had tears in my eyes I was laughing so hard. The duster stopped of his own accord after a block or two and raised his hands.
“Okay! Okay! Okay!”
The duster was suddenly sober. Sgt Costa came to a stop and bent over at the waist, resting his left hand on his left thigh for support, while he gasped for breath. He held his right hand extended with the taser aimed shakily at the duster,
“Get…on…the…ground…”, Sgt Costa managed to gasp.
“Okay! Okay! Okay!”, agreed the duster as he quickly laid on his back.
The rest of us reformed in a circle around the duster, all of us still laughing our asses off. Sgt Costa was not so amused, he was more concerned with breathing, between commands to the duster,
“Roll over!”
“Okay! Okay! Okay!”
The duster rolled onto his stomach, and looked up at Sgt Costa, eagerly awaiting the next command.
“Put your hands behind your back!”
“Okay! Okay! Okay!”, still eager to please.
Sgt Costa tucked his shirt back in and gave the tazer an approving look. The duster was hooked and booked without further incident.
Verdict – Rocky Costa I personally am not fond of dusters as pets. They are moody, howl too loudly, slobber on everything and are not very focused pets. My personal pet preferences aside, the Court finds your duster training method remarkably effective. But shock treatment? The latest literature suggests that dusters respond far more eagerly to love and affection, than they do to pain and punishment. The Court finds you Guilty Of Pet Cruelty and Being An Unlicensed Contractor (doing Electrical Work Without A License)
Sentence – On the charge of Pet Cruelty, the Court orders you to become a member of the ADOA (American Duster Owners Association), attend their Duster Training Course and present this Court with a Certificate of Completion.
On the charge of Being An Unlicensed Contractor, the Court orders you to attend any Contractor’s Licensing Course before doing any other electrical work.
When Rocky Costa was a Sgt on the Early Mornings shift, he was pretty big. He was no Fat Sam mind you. He couldn’t even give Fat Sam a run for his vending machine money, but he was still pretty big.
One graveyard shift, some deputies jammed a duster (a guy high on P.C.P.) on Gardena Bl. and Figueroa St., right in the middle of the intersection. It was about midnight, and it was cold, but the guy was barefoot and shirtless and sweating his ass off. The deputies requested the Field Sgt respond. Sgt Costa responded along with me and my partner, Jeff Adams in 162B and about four other deputies. So there we were, eight deputies in a semicircle around the duster, with Sgt Costa at the apex of the semicircle. One deputy was giving commands to the duster, which the duster was ignoring. The other deputies were getting ready to swarm the duster and take him to the ground, when Sgt Costa told us to hold off. He walked to his car, dug around in the trunk and returned to his spot in the semicircle, carrying a taser. We had just received the taser at the station a few days before. Sgt Costa examined the taser and said,
“I want to try this thing out.”
The Deputies impatience at having to stand down, was immediately replaced by curiosity. None of us had ever seen the taser in action either. After ten or twenty seconds of fumbling with the taser, Sgt Costa was finally ready for Freddy. He aimed the taser at the duster and asked,
“Are you going to cooperate and do what the deputies tell you?”
“AHHHHHH! Blobbitty, blah, blah bleblangitty blee bong!", or words to that effect, was the duster’s defiant response.
Sgt Costa fired the taser, sending two little metal darts, attached to the taser by thin copper wires, flying at the duster. One dart hit the duster in the chest, the other hit the duster in the lower abdomen. The duster looked at the darts protruding from his torso in surprise, then started to laugh. The duster’s laughter was cut short, when Sgt Costa activated the taser, sending however many bunches of volts of electricity into the duster’s chest and stomach. We were not disappointed with the effect.
“YEEEEEEOOOOOWWWWWW!!!!!”, the duster yelled, as he leapt in the air. In mid-air, he did a 180 degree turn and started churning his arms and legs like he was sprinting. He looked kind of like a Warner Bros. cartoon character. When he landed he took off running northbound away from us. For a moment we were all taken by surprise, by the duster’s reaction, then we all started laughing. The slack in the wire quickly started running out, which would have caused either the darts to be pulled out of the duster, or the wires to be pulled out of the taser, either way, it would have rendered the taser useless, unless Sgt Costa fired another pair of darts into the guy. And Sgt Costa didn’t have another pair of darts. So Sgt Costa ran after the duster, with his right arm extended, to keep the taser as close to the suspect as possible, so the wires wouldn't be pulled loose. Then the 1st pair of deputies, closest to Sgt Costa, realized what was happening and ran after Sgt Costa. Then the next pair of deputies realized what was happening and ran after the first pair of deputies. Then the third pair ran after the second pair and finally the fourth pair of deputies ran after the third pair of deputies. We looked like a formation of geese chasing the duster. All of us were younger and faster (and considerably slimmer) than Sgt Costa and should have been able to catch up and pass him by, but we were laughing so hard we couldn’t run fast. I had tears in my eyes I was laughing so hard. The duster stopped of his own accord after a block or two and raised his hands.
“Okay! Okay! Okay!”
The duster was suddenly sober. Sgt Costa came to a stop and bent over at the waist, resting his left hand on his left thigh for support, while he gasped for breath. He held his right hand extended with the taser aimed shakily at the duster,
“Get…on…the…ground…”, Sgt Costa managed to gasp.
“Okay! Okay! Okay!”, agreed the duster as he quickly laid on his back.
The rest of us reformed in a circle around the duster, all of us still laughing our asses off. Sgt Costa was not so amused, he was more concerned with breathing, between commands to the duster,
“Roll over!”
“Okay! Okay! Okay!”
The duster rolled onto his stomach, and looked up at Sgt Costa, eagerly awaiting the next command.
“Put your hands behind your back!”
“Okay! Okay! Okay!”, still eager to please.
Sgt Costa tucked his shirt back in and gave the tazer an approving look. The duster was hooked and booked without further incident.
Verdict – Rocky Costa I personally am not fond of dusters as pets. They are moody, howl too loudly, slobber on everything and are not very focused pets. My personal pet preferences aside, the Court finds your duster training method remarkably effective. But shock treatment? The latest literature suggests that dusters respond far more eagerly to love and affection, than they do to pain and punishment. The Court finds you Guilty Of Pet Cruelty and Being An Unlicensed Contractor (doing Electrical Work Without A License)
Sentence – On the charge of Pet Cruelty, the Court orders you to become a member of the ADOA (American Duster Owners Association), attend their Duster Training Course and present this Court with a Certificate of Completion.
On the charge of Being An Unlicensed Contractor, the Court orders you to attend any Contractor’s Licensing Course before doing any other electrical work.
I'm sure there are some that think you stretch the truth. I was a cop for 30 years. You can't make this stuff up! Thanks for the good read!
ReplyDeleteI think I found something to laugh about almost every day, as a cop. I hope you like the rest of the stories.
DeleteGreat story! I have a question, is there any chance to chat with you for a little bit? For instance on discord if you know what it is :). I come from Poland and i'm passionate about law enforcement in the US, but basically the main areas of my interest are Law Enforcement Agencies in California especially LASD. Got so many questions to ask, but only if you're willing to chat of course! :D
ReplyDeleteBump! ;D
DeleteThanks, but I won't give my phone number out.
DeleteHaha, it would cost me alot to call you from Poland, but I meant some text software like Discord, maybe Skype? It also allows you to talk via text chat, thanks for your response though.
DeleteAnd i'm sorry for being pushy, but you're the only LASD deputy i've reached, so I thought why not ask you.
DeleteHahahaha. Loved this!! I chuckled all the way through. 'Dusters' as pets!!!!
ReplyDeleteWonderful blog. Hope you are still writing. Wambaugh needs a successor. I tried to subscribe but goofy validation service is not sending me my link to either email. �� Suggestion?
ReplyDeleteI'm not very computer literate so, other than to keep checking back
DeleteEnjoying every read.
ReplyDeleteWell thanks. I take that as a compliment
Delete