The Retired Cop

  Case #65 - re The People vs Don Chanler ( A lesson for all trainees ) Don Chanler was the Question Cadet in our Academy class, class #226.  At the end of each long day, one of the staff instructors would come in and, prior to dismissing us for the day, would always ask if anyone had any questions about the day's classes.  There was only one cadet who would ever raise his hand.  Don Frickin' Chanler.  Chanler would immediately raise his hand and the staff instructor would resignedly call his name. Chanler would always ask obvious question, after obvious question, delaying our release for the day with ev-ery sin-gle point-less ques-tion.  As with all Question Cadets, only he was interested in what he had to ask.  Three years later, Don Frickin Chanler came to Carson with me, Mike Chacon and about 8 other people from our Academy class.  In Patrol School, we were not relieved to discover that he had not changed.  In fact he had gotten worse, be...

  Case #64 - re The People vs Greg Lemancha ( A synonym for cheap ) Then of course, there was Greg Lemancha. Greg was a former flight controller that was among the strikers fired by President Ronald Reagan. Once he became a deputy sheriff, he quickly found that the job had its perks. Cheap mattresses from Simmons, free yogurt from Yoplait and best of all, free food from McDonald’s. A typical day for Greg would be to log on after briefing, and bee-line it to McDonald’s for breakfast. After awhile, Greg decided that eating on-the-cuff once a day wasn’t enough for a growing boy in his late 40’s, so Greg came up with the Dayshift motto, “ Do it early, so you can do it again! ” Now Greg was eating his Egg McMuffins for free and 4 hours later his Big Mac combo for the same price. Not bad. Then Greg began instituting his Personal Rule of, “ Do it early, do it twice, do it three times for my lady and once more for my baby! ”, in which he ate as soon as he logged on, then half way ...

  Case #63 – The People vs Mike Kennard & Walter Zipusch (a backup plan to a backup plan, or fried eggs & sausage) In August 2007, Mike Kennard and Walter Zipusch were radio car partners. One hot day, they came across a man standing in the street. The two deputies came to the opinion that the man in the street was under the influence of P.C.P. (peperidine phencyclidine). This opinion was based on several objective physical symptoms which included, a blank stare, drooling, eyeballs bouncing up and down, profuse sweating, the odor of P.C.P and let's see... what else... oh yeah, he was butt-ass naked. Knowing how strong, violently unpredictable and impervious to pain people under the influence of P.C.P can be, Mike and Walter approached the suspect slowly and cautiously with their Berettas aimed at him. They also requested assistance from other units, and a Field Sergeant. A Sheriff's Department helicopter arrived over head and began to orbit. In his best authoritative...