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Case #64 - re The People vs Greg Lemancha (A synonym for cheap)

 Case #64 - re The People vs Greg Lemancha (A synonym for cheap)

Then of course, there was Greg Lemancha. Greg was a former flight controller that was among the strikers fired by President Ronald Reagan. Once he became a deputy sheriff, he quickly found that the job had its perks. Cheap mattresses from Simmons, free yogurt from Yoplait and best of all, free food from McDonald’s. A typical day for Greg would be to log on after briefing, and bee-line it to McDonald’s for breakfast. After awhile, Greg decided that eating on-the-cuff once a day wasn’t enough for a growing boy in his late 40’s, so Greg came up with the Dayshift motto, “Do it early, so you can do it again!” Now Greg was eating his Egg McMuffins for free and 4 hours later his Big Mac combo for the same price. Not bad. Then Greg began instituting his Personal Rule of, “Do it early, do it twice, do it three times for my lady and once more for my baby!”, in which he ate as soon as he logged on, then half way through his shift, and finally, on his way in to the station at the end of shift, he would pick up dinner for his family. All, without ever cracking his wallet! He would then change clothes and drive home in traffic to Huntington Beach, 20 miles away. By the time he got home that food had to be 70-90 minutes old, but who cared? It was free!
The good times came to an end one Saturday, when Greg was on his days off. Greg drove his family into Carson, on their way to Huntington State Beach, from his home in Huntington Beach, to eat for free at McDonald’s. For those of you not familiar with the area, that's a one way derour of over 20 miles. When he placed his order, surrounded by the Missus and all the little Lemanchas, he was charged $22.00 bucks. Well that certainly wouldn’t do! Not at all! Apparently this cashier didn’t know who he was! He demanded to speak to the manager. The manager informed him that the courtesy meals were for on-duty deputies, not for off-duty deputies and all of their clansmen. But Lemancha was no fool! He knew when someone was trying to take advantage of him and he wasn’t about to be scammed out of his cash by this manager. He demanded that the manager call the owner. The owner came and Lemancha explained how the insolent cashier and manager had asked him to pay for his food, he hadn’t paid for the past 2,376 meals, why should he pay for this one. The owner thought about it and agreed that Lemancha should get his family’s meal for free. So Greg and his family sat down for their free meal. Everybody was happy. Greg was happy, because he didn’t spend any money. Greg’s family was happy, because they got their food. And the owner was happy because he never gave a free meal to a Deputy again.
Thanks Greg for making everyone so happy.
Verdict – Greg Lemancha, this Court finds you Guilty of Being The Cheapest Son-Of-A-Bitch to ever stand before this Court!
Sentence – You are ordered to star in the sequel to the documentary movie, “Supersize Me”, to be titled, “Supersize Me Too”, but instead of a 30 day filming project, this will be a 1 year filming project. Personally I think you’ll have a heart attack before the third month. You are also to be audited by the IRS for all those free meals you didn’t claim. You are also ordered to join the Mormon Church and Tithe 15% of your earnings you cheap fcuk! And I’m charging you $500.00 for Court costs. Get out of here deadbeat!

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